Grammar nerd ranting; feel free to ignore.

I realize I'm not perfect and freely admit that I am a little rusty on the rules of comma use, but I do flip out over certain grammatical/spelling errors, especially the mixing up of contractions/possessives like "you're"/"your", "it's"/"its", or "they're"/"their". This is possibly due in part to having a high school grammar teacher who looked quite a bit like Patrick Stewart (and had a Captain Picard-like presence even) and literally patrolled the halls listening for improper grammar, writing tickets for offenders, making them appear in Grammar Court (I think its very existence merits capitalization; and no, I'm not fabricating its existence), and imposing small fines. I never got caught, either because my grammatical skills were rather epic or because I was a nerd who rarely had the opportunity to speak to anyone. Anyway, I'm blathering on here, but I'm just offering some context before making fun of someone, a completely anonymous party. Last week on my lunch break I went to an eating establishment which shall remain unnamed (but shouldn't be hard to figure out for those who happen to be aware of current promotions that are being heavily advertised on TV with a neat Godzilla knockoff), and they had this crudely written sign displayed at the counter. Its message, although vaguely clear, is so badly written in so skillful a way, it's almost as if it's intended to be humorous or possibly written by someone with a degree in Bizarro grammar.



Take a look at that:

"REGULAR STEAK (FT.)
ONLY $5.00 (FIVE)
DOLLAR.
Fore Limited Time Only.
THANKS."

The next day said sign had been upgraded to this:



The most entertaining elements here are "Doe's not included", "Pastrmi", "Chease" (twice even!) and "Valu". Not as poetically bad as the first sign, but it's still noteworthy.

Anyway, I'm off to a comic book store to observe an Iron Man costume contest. That's where grammar snobbery gets you, kids.