Whisk: an entirely fictional William Shatner endorsement

With William Shatner's absence from the new Star Trek movie (which makes perfect sense continuity-wise) I thought perhaps reposting this old thing would appease, to some degree, any huge Shatner fans out of the three people who are reading. I wrote this script in a college class on writing advertisements for radio. This assignment was to write a 60 second radio advertisement for a non-existant razor blade company that made their blades from whatever material it is from which spacecraft are made. Naturally there was only one man alive who could effectively endorse such a product. The resulting script, posted below, kind of ticked off the professor. But he was so ticked off he angrily read the script to the class, and the room erupted with laughter. I do hope that was not my life's greatest achievement. So here's the script:

Client: Whisk razor blades
Description: 60 sec humorous
Airdate: 15 June 1999
Author: Liam Kemp
Title: Shatner endorsement

ANNCR: For Whisk razor blades here's William Shatner.

SHATNER: Hello I'm William Shatner. Most of you remember me as Captain James T. Kirk of Star Trek fame. Over the years I've been asked by thousands of fans how I managed to bed at least one alien chick in just about every episode of Star Trek and get away with this blatant disregard for the Prime Directive. Well my answer is Whisk razor blades. They're new right now but by the twenty-third century everyone will use them. If they work such wonders on future alien women just imagine the success you could be having right now on earth with blades made of ceramic used for America's space exploration program. They might cost a little more than lower quality blades but it's worth it. Listen to me-

ADMIRAL: (BEEPING SOUND CUTS SHATNER OFF IN MID-SENTENCE... FEMALE VOICE) This is Starfleet Command. We've another child support claim from the planet Orion....hey how did you get such a close smooth shave?

SHATNER: Um, with Whisk space-age razor blades.

ADMIRAL: What was I saying?

SHATNER: Just to buy whisk razor blades and the future will be yours now.

ADMIRAL: And they're great for women too.